Kenzo Pour Homme by Kenzo (1991)

Kenzo Pour Homme by Kenzo (1991)

Hey guys, been a while since I posted on the good ol' blog!, however I have been doing ALOT of videos! 38 so far! so yes! been busy!. Today I'm going to talk about an amazing scent! I'm talking the sort of scent that when women walk past you they think "...Why am I wet?" Oh yes!, sex in a bottle! KENZO POUR HOMME!. It's Japanese...need I say more? the Japs are amazing are like...everything!, even perfumery! and Kenzo is a classic example of that!

Now, basic information about this, this fragrance was released waaay back in 1991, when the 80s was just dying out spandex sales were at an all time low (I know, it's a shame eh?, that shit was kinky!) and fragrances were taking a new direction, scents such as Chanel Egoiste, Paco Rabanne XS and many other classics were flooding shelves with hairy chested men with gold chains running into stores to buy them...oh sorry I forgot, this is the 90s right?, allow me to correct myself!, men in brightly coloured Kappa tracksuits and Nike Air Max running into stores to buy them, there we go, much better!

Now the fragrance: It's amazing, really, it is honestly a masterpiece in perfumery, and still surpasses some more modern releases in terms of quality and originality, Kenzo Pour Homme goes to show that there is no such thing as an outdated fragrance, and it certainly smells a lot better than some of the latest releases (*cough* Invictus *cough*) It is however not widely available in stores and will most likely only be available online! but that is best as you would be paying £43 for a 50ml bottle where-as you could get 100ml for that price or cheaper online!. However If I am honest? you could pay £100 for this fragrance and it would STILL be worth it, it really is a classic! it smells like walking along an ocean with the breeze hitting your face with a grassy area near the beach also blending into the smell, Kenzo is PURE OCEAN! remember my post on Cool Water? well that reminds me of a swimming pool, but Kenzo reminds me of the ocean! and i LOVE the ocean! fuck yeah!.

How would you wear it: Kenzo to me is perfect for any occasion, Work, Date, Casual, anything, it really is the ultimate in quality and versatility, all pros and no cons, even the bottle looks like the handle of a Katana, I mean come on! how awesome is that shit!? why would you NOT want this in your collection, seriously, it's strong too! projection, sillage and longevity are all good! I would say 4 to 5 sprays tops with this one, the usual routine, 1 to chest, lower neck, back of neck and wrists and you're set to get make girls wet!...like the ocean! and Kenzo smells of the ocean!...get my drift? eh? ehhhhh!? hehehehehe!

Is it for you?: Let me rephrase that, Do you want to smell like a king, and wear a fragrance that not so many people know about, therefore not so many people will be wearing? making you unique! or would you rather wear 1 Million...exactly this won't smell like ANYTHING you have ever smelled before, Kenzo is Kenzo it doesn't "Smell like this" no it smells of Kenzo, there is only one Kenzo, as the Kurgan said in the movie Highlander "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" and damn, he was right! I bet he would wear Kenzo if that movie was made in the 90s! so yeah...there you go, disagree? GO TAKE IT UP WITH HIM TOUGH GUY!

Now comes the sad part of the post!...the ending! but remember, not everyone will like this, some people are pussies with no balls who want to fit in and smell the same, be sure to remember, these people don't count, and only exist for your amusement, imagine you're at a bowling alley...they're the pins, get my point?, if someone dislikes this? well just remember, some people dislike BMWs but they're still classy as hell! so there ya go! you make sure and wear that Kenzo with pride, and if anyone says anything, just remember to quote what the Kurgan said to MacLeod in Highlander "You will always be WEAKER than I!" or in this case, YOU always smell WORSE than I! GRRR OH YEAH!

Fragrance List

Fragrance List

In this video I present a list of fragrances I will be discussing in the future. Enjoy!

Fragrances in order of appearance:

1 Million by Paco Rabanne
Allure Homme Sport Extreme by Chanel
Angel for Men by Thierry Mugler
Aramis by Aramis
Armani Code Ultimate by Giorgio Armani
Black XS L'Exces by Paco Rabanne
Boss Bottled by Hugo Boss
Brut by Faberge
Cerruti Image by Cerruti
Cool Water by Davidoff
Drakkar Noir by Guy Laroche
Fahrenheit by Dior
Fuel For Life by Diesel
Guilty Intense by Gucci
Homme Intense by Dior
Joop! Homme by Joop!
Le Male by Jean Paul Gaultier
Old Spice by Proctor & Gamble
Only The Brave by Diesel
Paco Rabanne Pour Homme by Paco Rabanne
Pierre Cardin by Pierre Cardin
XS by Paco Rabanne

Song used: FM Attack - Yesterday

Joop! Homme by Joop! (1989)

Joop! Homme by Joop!

.....JOOP!, sorry I just HAD to!, I love the name of this fragrance, bright pink liquid with a name like that just looks like so much fun!, I also recently found out that it is apparently pronounced "Yope!" although I still call it Joop! as most conversations go along the lines of "Oh what are you wearing?" "Yope!" "Yope!? never heard of that one" "Sorry, Joop!" "Oh Joop! I love that!" ...ya see?...it's a sad world when you can't even pronounce a cologne's name correctly for fear of no one recognising it! BLARGH! what a crazy world!

Now for some basic information. This fragrance was released in 1989 and was an instant hit, a PERFECT clubbing cologne, pink, funny name, lasts for ages, smells sweet and appeals to ladies and came with the best chat up line ever for guys "Hey Ladies, I'm wearing Joop!"...some colognes say that 60% of the time, they work...every time! (Come on...a Lex blog post without an Anchorman quote!?...are you mad!?"). However, Joop! works 100% of the time, every time and most of the men using it woke up in the bed of a woman entranced by the scent of his JOOP!...100% of the time!, OH YES! GENTLEMEN OH YES! back in 1989 this was the greatest thing since Jovan Musk For Men by Jovan, but I'll discuss that another time! now the rules!

Rule 1: It's strong as hell, remember that - Sprayed 5 sprays of this? JOOPSIE DAISY! big mistake! this fragrance is strong as hell, My recommendation? 2 sprays! maybe 3 if you are Chuck Norris but if not, then no more than 2! one on the lower neck and one on the back of the neck is fine. Trust me with Joop! less is more!, you'll thank me when you go through a three full packs of condoms in one night! WOOP! WOOP! sorry...i mean! JOOP! JOOP!.

Rule 2: Dress down! - Joop! is nice but it isn't what I would call classy I think a polo shirt with jeans or even chinos and trainers would be okay with this, perhaps casual shoes, but In no way would this be worn with a suit! or even a smart shirt with jeans, polo shirt is as dressy as it gets with Joop! I mean fair enough I wear it with my blue trousers and white blazer and Italian shoes for the Miami Vice look but hey, I still think it's 1984, so yeah dress it down with this one gents!

Rule 3: Wear it if you like it - Some people will HATE Joop! "It's sickly sweet" "Smells like cheap bubble gum in a bottle" These people have opinions, however that is all they have, if they don't like the smell of Joop! and complain to you about it...screw em!, you're the one having a good time with a smile on your face and they're in a hissy fit having to smell this so-called "horrid" fragrance, and I promise you if you complained about their scent you would get brushed aside with some bitchy comment like "Well you'll just have to deal with it!" Ignore these hypocrites gentlemen, if you like Joop! wear Joop! and wear it with pride!

Now this is the sad end of the post! but all I would like to say is, this stuff rocks, I love beasty longevity and sillage and this rivals A* Men by Thierry Mugler so be sure to check it out and it is also cheaper than most of the fragrances I got my 75ml bottle for £20! so yes that was a steal so shop around!.

Cool Water by Davidoff (1988)

Cool Water by Davidoff

Let's be honest, who HASN'T heard of this? Nobody, unless you have been living under a rock for the past 30 years, which if so then my hat goes off to you, however this fragrance is well known for one reason: It was the first aquatic fragrance to hit shelves, before Acqua Di Gio and Versace Pour Homme, Cool Water was sitting on a beach in 1988 searching for a fuck to give, that's how cool it is.

Now for some basic information. Cool Water was created by Davidoff, as in Zino Davidoff, the world's cigar king...now be honest a fragrance produced by a company that was heavily involved in bringing Cuban cigars to the rest of the world, is fit for a king, I imagine the decision at Davidoff HQ must have went along this lines of this "Okay guys that was some epic fun we had becoming millionaires by introducing the world to Cuban cigars, now that we're cigar kings and all what shall we do next week!?" "I know let's become fragrance kings!" "It's a deal! and we'll go out after it and get drunk off our asses but not feel bad because we smell so good!" "I'll drink to that...HEAVILY!" and so the Davidoff fragrance range was born! now! THE RULES!

Rule 1: Don't drown yourself in it - This is not the strongest fragrance in the world to be fair, but don't drown in it all the same at the very MAX I would recommend five sprays, one on chest, one on back of neck, one on each wrist. Sorted! and also...LET IT DRY DOWN...TRUST ME! many people think Cool Water smells like cleaning liquid on first application, I tend to disagree I think it smells more of a cool swimming pool on a hot day, it has that sort of chlorine type smell to it at first (and I know I keep using the word "cool" every ten seconds but seriously...this fragrance is impossible to describe without using it! JUST GIVE ME A GODDAMN BREAK OK!?...it's fine...I'm cool...I'm coo-...DAMMIT! anyhow, back to the guide!) So let it dry down into a nice aquatic scent and you are set to go I would give it about 15 minutes before leaving the house.

Rule 2: Don't wear it in winter - Just don't, wearing this fragrance in winter is like wearing a jumper in summer, you just don't do it. This is a fragrance that instantly makes me feel cooler just by sniffing the nozzle, seriously I'm not kidding they should bring out one that can cure any illness, Placebo by Davidoff!...one day gentlemen...one day!. I picked the finest time to wear this fragrance, my graded unit exam, boiling hot day, air conditioned exam room and the smell of Cool Water flowing from me and around the room, was the most relaxed exam I have ever sat. Fact! so yes, hot day? spray this on and you will be a king among men. Spray this on during a cold day, and you'll be a DEAD MAN!

Rule 3: Play it cool - Again it's not a deliberate pun but seriously this cologne is really really fresh and aquatic, reminds me of holidays, hot day walking around the beach and the shops with the sun beating down and you get back to the hotel, hot and tired and slip into the nice cool swimming pool for instant relief, Cool Water brings all those pleasant memories of past holidays flooding back in a tidal-wave of nostalgia! and is worth buying just for that, I could be a therapist using this, I imagine it would go like this "Oh doctor I just...don't know what to do anymore!" "I do...take a sniff of this" "Oh...I'm imagining me and my husbands honeymoon to Spain! oh the memories, oh! thank you doctor" "Oh Mrs Arcaro the pleasure is all mine!" HELL YEAH! Cool Water advert right there!

Anyhow the sad part...the end! I hope you all have enjoyed this little discussion on this late 80s classic! I certainly have and I made it all the way through without referencing Anchorman which is an impressive feat for me. Anyhow, since this is the end of the guide, please excuse me while I go and play some jazz flute.....I did it again didn't I? DAMMIT!. Why don't you people cheer me up by going out and buying a bottle of this fresh aquatic classic!

My first fragrance video! - Fragrances With Lex Ellis - Paco Rabanne Pour Homme (1973)

My first fragrance video! 

 Fragrances With Lex Ellis - Paco Rabanne Pour Homme (1973)

I have decided that to accompany the posts on this blog, I have started a youtube video series called "Fragrances With Lex Ellis" this is my first video where I discuss the 70s classic - Paco Rabanne Pour Homme!

Sadly my microphone is built-in to my cheap £15 webcam! so the quality is not perfect however to make up for it I decided to wear a suit, because we all want to look our best on TV!
Please do give me feedback on this video! if it's terrible and you feel like hunting me down and punching me multiple times in the face! say so!. If you thought it was good and detailed and gave you a chuckle and is the greatest thing you have ever seen in your entire life and deserves an Oscar then please say so too! and if you just like the catchy song at the beginning along with the cool Paco Rabanne poster ads then say so too!

Hope you all enjoy! and more to come. You stay classy San Dieg-...I mean Blogger!

Brut by Faberge (1964)

Brut by Faberge

Brut...that one name says it all, and just mentioning it to somewhere who wore this back in the day will send memories of orgies, crazy sex parties, swinging couples and "No Pants Day" flooding back...okay maybe not those memories exactly! but certainly some rather good ones. Just listen to the name "Brut" you instantly think of a muscular, big, tough masculine figure a "Brute" so to speak, but it's French, so it has a little touch of elegance to it...a very little touch, but it's still there. This fragrance was introduced to me like so many others before me...by my father, that says it all really "Who introduced you to it?" "MY FATHER!" "You...amazing human being...god bless you!" that is roughly along the lines of how the conversation would go if that question was asked, trust me, i've been there!

Anyhow here is some basic information, in the 60s/70s this stuff was the bomb! I mean it still smells fresher than some fragrances today! and it's over 40 years old, it's cheap, it's masculine, it's french, it smells like something Brian Fantana would wear (Again me referring to Anchorman LOVE that movie) and it has a ton of clever and witty adverts which have been shown on tv over the years...what's NOT to like? it's also one i've noticed hasn't fallen into the "Outdated" category which is surprising as I thought the ignorant noses of society would have hammered this into the ground. I guess it's just Aramis they hate.

Rule 1: Try not to bomb people - No I don't mean throwing molotov cocktails out of the window of a Mercedes-Benz, as fun as it sounds I am saying that this fragrance can become a bit powdery and pongy if overused  it is not as strong as say Aramis or Paco Rabanne, however it still packs a punch! I would recommend 3-4 sprays tops with this one, one on chest, lower neck, back of neck and spray on one wrist and press against the other wrist to complete the application of this true classic!

Rule 2: Don't worry about dress style! - If you ask me this fragrance can be fairly versatile, can be worn with a tracksuit, jeans and t-shirt and also a suit, it is not too offensive as long as you don't bathe in it! (I love that saying! "Bathing in cologne", I imagine some hairy chested man with a 70s porno moustache and gold medallion in a big bathtub of Brut giving you a thumbs up! anyhow enough fantasizing and back to the guide!) So yes it would be good for the workplace also as it is a pleasant scent. What more can you ask for?

Rule 3: Image - Brut portrays an image of hairy chests, gold medallions, porno moustaches, spandex, bondage, various front covers of Playboy okay okay! maybe not the last three but it still has a specific image. Basically if you are the sort of guy who gets his nails done and visits the tanning salon then this is not for you, you might consider it "Too strong" or "Too powerful" the only type of man I can imagine turning down a scent with such traits is a total metrosexual, who has role models consisting of: One Direction, Justin Bieber, Nicki Minaj...need I go on? Good, otherwise I might have to bathe in some Brut to regain some of my lost masculinity!

All in all I highly recommend this to anyone, it is a classic father-to-son cologne, many people including myself saw the aftershave version of Brut sitting in their fathers bathroom just waiting to be picked up. To all of you who never had that experience of asking your father "Dad, what is that green bottle?" and having him reply "It's BRUT BY FABERGE!" in the same strong and bold tone as the guy from the commercials whoever he is, we'll say his name is Tony Powers, because that sounds manly!. Basically...what I'm trying to say is.....GET SOME NOW!

Fahrenheit by Christian Dior (1988)

Fahrenheit by Christian Dior

Man do I love this scent, Fahrenheit by Christian Dior is a fragrance like no other! way ahead of it's time, released way back in 1988 it still smells more modern than some of the latest releases! don't believe me? smell it yourself and see. This is a very jeans, white t-shirt and leather jacket scent, so all you 50s greasers out there can rejoice and spray this on while shouting "TUNNEL SNAKES RULE!". Off the bat it smells like pure gasoline and I'm not quoting Anchorman, I kid you not that is what it smells like but it's a classy smell at the same time, kind of like that dude from Rebel Without A Cause he's a tough guy who knows how to handle himself...but deep inside is a romancing passionate man hiding behind a tough guy persona. That's what Fahrenheit is like...pure manly petroleum...but with a touch of class!

Now some basic information, this cologne has longevity and projection to the MAX seriously, the first time I wore this people could smell me outside the room and that wasn't me overdoing it! it can also be a little offensive...well little is an understatement it's very GRRR DON'T FUCK WITH ME! and it has no problem showing it! so use with caution!

Rule 1: Don't bathe in it! - Yeah you read it right you know the term "Bathing in cologne!" I promise you it came from this fragrance (Or maybe Paco Rabanne Pour Homme...god knows!) However this can be a very in-your-face fragrance and could put some people off, as you all probably know by now I couldn't care less what people think, If I want to slick my hair back and shout "TUNNEL SNAKES RULE!" in public while wearing this then I shall! and I encourage others to do the same. I recommend no more than three sprays, one to the chest, lower neck and back of neck to get the most out of this fragrance!

Rule 2: Don't overdress - Now I know what I said before about this being a classy scent but it is also a very casual one, as I mentioned above the classic jeans, white t-shirt and leather jacket look? PERFECT! you know how with some scents you get a free gift with them? like a bag or something? well this should come with a free leather jacket! I swear I would pay £300 for this if it came with a leather jacket and I would still get my moneys worth, it's THAT good even a sharp collared shirt, jeans and shoes or better CHELSEA BOOTS! you know the 60s style with the cuban heels? Yeah! I have a pair myself and have the whole Lethal Weapon look going on! however I wouldn't recommend this for wearing with a suit or for going to work...well...maybe with just ONE spray but that's it!

Rule 3: Persona - Dior Fahrenheit represents a casual, confident, rugged kind of man, the sort of man who as a child his first words were "WHISKEY!" and who came out of his mothers womb wearing full biker leathers and sporting a badass stubble. Fair enough not all of us are that manly but we can certainly come close! and that's exactly what you're gonna have to do this this scent! I highly advise throwing away your razor and wearing only clothes made from denim or leather! that should do the trick!

Now comes the sad part...THE END OF THE GUIDE! yes yes now stop crying! your a Fahrenheit man! ACT LIKE IT SON!. Anyway, this scent is an absolute classic 10 years from now it will still be baffling people with its classy petroleum scent, it is an excellent addition to the Dior fragrance range, completely dumping the "Elegant and well kept male" persona that most of Dior's fragrances give off and going somewhere completely different and still coming out a winner! definitely try it out!